mixedberry
Anthony's Spanish Tutor
"Don't dilly-dally there, pretty lady. We're all gonna be down here talking about you."
Posts: 243
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Jan 14, 2008 15:19:38 GMT -5
Post by mixedberry on Jan 14, 2008 15:19:38 GMT -5
great post texasgal
To add to that there's a Cleveland, Texas as well near Houston ;D
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Jan 14, 2008 15:19:48 GMT -5
Post by Lom83 on Jan 14, 2008 15:19:48 GMT -5
Received from our boss! Texas is the FUN state!! A list of actual places to travel in Texas ... towns and zip codes: Need to be cheered up? Happy, Texas 79042 Pep , Texas 79353 Smiley , Texas 78159 Paradise , Texas 76073 Rainbow , Texas 76077 Sweet Home , Texas 77987 Comfort , Texas 78013 Friendship, Texas 76530 *** Love the Sun? Sun City , Texas 78628 Sunrise , Texas 76661 Sunset, Texas 76270 Sundown, Texas 79372 Sunray , Texas 79086 Sunny Side , Texas 77423 *** Want something to eat? Bacon , Texas 76301 Noodle , Texas 79536 Oatmeal , Texas 78605 Turkey , Texas 79261 Trout , Texas 75789 Sugar Land , Texas 77479 Salty, Texas 76567 Rice , Texas 75155 And top it off with: Sweetwater , Texas 79556 (Texasgal's addition: I believe there's a Tuna, Texas) *** Why travel to other cities? Texas has them ALL! Detroit , Texas 75436 Colorado City , Texas 79512 Denver City , Texas 79323 Nevada , Texas 75173 Memphis , Texas 79245 Miami , Texas 79059 Boston , Texas 75570 Santa Fe , Texas 77517 Tennessee Colony , Texas 75861 Reno , Texas 75462 *** Feel like traveling outside the country? Don't bother buying a plane ticket! Athens , Texas 75751 Canadian , Texas 79014 China , Texas 77613 Egypt , Texas 77436 Turkey , Texas 79261 London , Texas 76854 New London , Texas 75682 Paris , Texas 75460 *** No need to travel to Washington D.C. Whitehouse , Texas 75791 *** We even have a city named after our planet! Earth , Texas 79031 *** And a city named after our State! Texas City , Texas 77590 *** Exhausted? Energy , Texas 76452 *** Cold? Blanket , Texas 76432 Winters, Texas *** Hot? Poolville, Texas 76487 Cool, Texas ( Parker County ) *** Like History? Santa Anna, Texas Goliad , Texas Alamo, Texas Gun Barrel City , Texas *** Need Office Supplies? Staples , Texas 78670 *** Men are from Mars, women are from Venus , Texas 76084 *** You guessed it... it's on the state line... Texline , Texas 79087 *** For the kids... Kermit , Texas 79745 Elmo , Texas 75118 Nemo , Texas 76070 Tarzan , Texas 79783 Winnie , Texas 77665 Sylvester , Texas 79560 *** Other city names in Texas , to make you smile..... :  Frognot , Texas 75424 Bigfoot , Texas 78005 Hogeye , Texas 75423 Cactus , Texas 79013 Notrees , Texas 79759 Plainview, Texas 79072 Best, Texas 76932 Veribest , Texas 76886 Kickapoo , Texas 75763 Dime Box, Texas Telephone , Texas 75488 Telegraph , Texas 76883 Whiteface , Texas 79379 Twitty, Texas 79079 *** And last but not least. The City that doesn't believe that Global warming exists: Kilgore , Texas 75662 *** Have a Good Day! *** P.S. Whoops, left out : Muleshoe Cut n shoot, Hoop And Holler, Ding Dong, and don't forget...... Farewell , Texas *** And, of course, there is a place in Texas that is...... KNOTT , TEXAS lol very funny TG, I never knew there were so many funny sounding parts of Texas lol thanks for sharing that. I remember hearing once there's a Livingston somewhere in the US (maybe not in Texas, im not sure). We have a town called Livingston about 5 or 10 miles away and close to where I work. Livingstone I presume hoho lol *ahem* anyway, funny post TG, thanks for that! |
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negirl
Archer Avenue Resident
Keeper of
Owen's Heart
Posts: 310
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Jan 14, 2008 15:58:29 GMT -5
Post by negirl on Jan 14, 2008 15:58:29 GMT -5
This isn't really a joke, but I thought it was good
Why, Why, Why
do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are
going dead?
Why do banks charge a fee on "insufficient funds" when they know there
is not enough money?
Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion
stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?
Why doesn't glue stick to the bottle?
Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?
Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?
Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you
throw a revolver at him?
Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
Whose idea was it to put an "S" in the word "lisp"?
If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes?
Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles
are always white?
Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?
Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that
something new to eat will have materialized?
Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their
vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it
down to give the vacuum one more chance?
Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the end on your first try?
How do those dead bugs get into those enclosed light fixtures?
When we are in the supermarket and someone rams our ankle with a
shopping cart then apologizes for doing so, why do we say, "It's all
right?" Well, it isn't all right, so why don't we say, "That hurt, you
stupid idiot?"
Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that's falling
off the table you always manage to knock something else over?
In winter why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer
when we complained about the heat?
How come you never hear father-in-law jokes?
And my FAVORITE......
The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four persons is
suffering from some sort of mental illness. Think of your three best
friends -- if they're okay, then it's you!!
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negirl
Archer Avenue Resident
Keeper of
Owen's Heart
Posts: 310
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Jan 14, 2008 16:00:28 GMT -5
Post by negirl on Jan 14, 2008 16:00:28 GMT -5
There's another one I have, but I don't know if I should post it.
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Jan 14, 2008 16:44:04 GMT -5
Post by texasgal on Jan 14, 2008 16:44:04 GMT -5
Ha, those are very good questions, Negirl. They look like the kind of question George Carlin used to ask in his stand-up routines.
I'd love it if you'd post the one you're not sure of. If you're not sure of its appropriateness, check it out with the admins. I've got a bit of a naughty sense of humor, but it's better to be safe than sorry.
Lom, glad you liked the "Texas Towns." There's a Livingston, NJ. There's probably a Livingston in almost every state as there is a Burlington in almost every state.
;D
How's this? There's a Boring, OR. It's just outside Portland.
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vendettav
Hutch's Tiny Dancer
You are such a fouton
Posts: 94
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Jan 14, 2008 21:35:25 GMT -5
Post by vendettav on Jan 14, 2008 21:35:25 GMT -5
This is from a Bathroom Reader's book - it had me in stitches last night when I read it. They are responses in letters from Russian high schoolers:  |
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Jan 14, 2008 21:51:45 GMT -5
Post by texasgal on Jan 14, 2008 21:51:45 GMT -5
Mixedberry, thank you for the contribution of Cleveland, Texas. It should be added to the official list!
Vendettav, that's a great essay. Full of surprises, lol.
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Jan 15, 2008 4:21:55 GMT -5
Post by Lom83 on Jan 15, 2008 4:21:55 GMT -5
Ha, those are very good questions, Negirl. They look like the kind of question George Carlin used to ask in his stand-up routines. I'd love it if you'd post the one you're not sure of. If you're not sure of its appropriateness, check it out with the admins. I've got a bit of a naughty sense of humor, but it's better to be safe than sorry. Lom, glad you liked the "Texas Towns." There's a Livingston, NJ. There's probably a Livingston in almost every state as there is a Burlington in almost every state. ;D How's this? There's a Boring, OR. It's just outside Portland. Ah lol ok. That sounds, uh, boring hehe |
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