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Post by Looney Linn on Mar 8, 2004 22:27:57 GMT -5
Hey guys, I've been really busy this weekend so I haven't had a chance yet to transcribe their appearance on Conan. I will try to get it done tomorrow.
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Post by Natalie on Mar 9, 2004 8:15:16 GMT -5
Thanks! I can't wait!
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Post by Looney Linn on Mar 9, 2004 22:00:14 GMT -5
C. O.: My first guests have appeared in numerous films together, and this is great, including The Royal Tenenbaums, Zoolander, and Meet The Parents. Well, starting today you can see them in Starsky & Hutch. Please welcome Ben Stiller and Owen Wilson.
(audience cheers and they wave to the crowd)
C.O.: Isn’t that nice?
B.S.: Thank you
C.O.: That’s all the time we have…goodbye everybody. That’s all the time we really had We can take the hysteria out in editing and replace it with a chilling silence when you come out.
O.W.: That’s what we’re used to.
C.O.: We add crickets and everything
O.W.: Yeah
C.O.: I was very excited when I heard you guys were making this movie because Starsky and Hutch, when I was…I’m trying to think when it was, but I think it was when I was in 5th, 6th, or 7th grade, it was huge. It was a really cool show, loved it..and um
B.S.: Yeah, they were like the coolest guys on t.v.
O.W. Sort of like the first cop show, before Miami Vice it like was Starsky and Hutch.
C.O.: Right, right and I heard you guys were making this movie and you’re out promoting this movie together. And you’re getting along well? You…
O.W.: Yeah, we’re getting along good. You learn about each others little kinda quirks and things after a hundred and eighty interviews. Ben has to get his M&M’s after a couple hours or he starts to get low blood sugar and gets a little cranky.
B.S.: Yeah, ok yeah, and Owen has his little raw, like, vegetables he likes to eat. He gets very healthy at press time.
C.O.: Owen likes the raw vegetables, huh?
B.S.: Yeah, and we’ve got these great stories we like to tell together, like this one.
C.O.: Yeah, this is one of your classics right? The old M&M’s and vegetables.
O.W.: Brings down the house.
B.S.: No, its just you end up telling the same sort of stock stories
O.W.: Well after a hundred and eighty interviews you kinda have your little jokes, your stories. Like, oh, Ben’s a bad driver, yeah, he took driving lessons. Yeah, but yesterday we go on Katie Couric and one of the big questions is ‘you guys work together a lot, what’s that like?’, and then I say we’re like Hope and Crosby and I give Ben the punchline-‘withouth the big following.’ And we go on yesterday, we’re kinda prepared, so I’m gonna say the Hope and Crosby then you weigh in, and it’s real frantic cuz it’s the Today Show.
B.S.: We got there late too. We got there at 7:36 and we had to go on at 7:41.
O.W.: It was crazy and then we were late and then I sat down and Katie says ‘I’m gonna ask you about Iraq and gay marriage,’ like…
C.O.: What??
O.W.: Kinda just to throw me off, so I was a little rattled.
C.O.: Why is she asking you that? That’s crazy
O.W.: I don’t know. She was just kinda, she was kidding me but it got me flustered, so then when we get into the interview and she says…
B.S.: He’s easily flustered.
O.W.: I get rattled easily. So we get into the interview, she says ‘You guys have worked together a lot’ that’s what I’ve been waiting for. That’s my opening, here I come. So I go ‘We’re kinda like Hope and Crosby’….silence from Ben, nothing. And then Katie says ‘Yeah, without the big following. I read it in Time Magazine, you just said it Owen.’ So she had read the punch line and then…
C.O.: Yeah, Boo Katie, right?
O.W.: No, but it was like, but then, it’s not so bad what Katie did. But my partner then piles on and says ‘Owen has no original material, he just says the same thing over and over.’
C.O.: So what, Ben sold you out?
B.S.: I was just going with the flow.
C.O.: Oh really?
O.W.: Ben, who’s been comatose all morning comes alive to kinda make me look like a fool.
C.O.: Yeah
B.S.: Kind of like how you’re coming alive now.
O.W.: Yeah, well every once in a while I can turn on the high beams.
B.S.: I didn’t leave a break for, I did not leave it hanging. She came in.
O.W.: Ben, it was like total silence when I looked at you, and then she had to like supply the punch line. And for the rest of the interview, it was like, I was in shock cause I looked like a fool.
B.S.: Cuz it was an old punch line.
C.O.: I think what we’ve learned from this is that when Ben sees a weakness he’ll attack, even if you’re an old friend.
O.W.: Its like Lord of the Flies with Ben, its like…
C.O.: Yeah, its like Piggy. That’s terrible..
O.W.: Yeah, you know
C.O.: Now um, lets talk about, we had Snoop her the other night. Snoop Dog is in the movie and I will defend this as the greatest casting choice ever, and I’ve gone through all the classic movies. This is the greatest around.
B.S.: Yeah
O.W.: There’s no getting around it.
C.O.: There’s no getting around Snoop playing Huggy Bear.
O.W.: No
C.O.: And I was very excited to hear that
B.S.: There was no other choice, literally nobody else was thought of.
O.W.: Nuf said.
C.O.: Alright
B.W.: There wasn’t
C.O.: Does he always say nuf said when you say no other choice?
O.W.: A reasonable man cannot differ, that’s my other one.
C.O.: That’s another one you use then. Well you know what I love about Snoop, when he shows up he’s got this great entourage and these uh…
O.W.: The Archbishop Don the Magic Juan, his spiritual advisor.
C.O.: Yes, we actually have a photo of this guy that travels with Snoop, there he is.
O.W.: That is not, like a particular like a crazy day.
C.O.: No
O.W.: That is like day to day wear.
C.O.: That’s his work clothes, in the basement, that’s what he wears.
B.S.: He was a, he was a pimp.
C.O.: Yeah
B.S.: A pimp that became a preacher..He wrote a book called from Pimpstick to Pulpit, it’s a real book.
O.W.: It’s a real book, I read it. I finally found someone who told my story.
B.S.: And that wasn’t a set up line
C.O.: No, no…so, this is great. Is it true, while you were making this movie and, this is a serious thing, we all love Snoop and we’re glad he’s ok, but someone actually took a shot at him?
O.W.: Oh, no, yeah, that’s right. The first week Ben came to me and was like ‘Did you hear?’ What. ‘Snoop got shot’ and I’m like Oh My Gosh, is he ok and that’s so terrible.
B.S.: He got shot at.
O.W.: He got shot at when he was driving home.
B.S.: He came for his wardrobe fitting, it was in the news. It was on CNN.
C.O.: Right, right.
B.S.: He was, I don’t know, it was some sort of gang thing.
O.W.: But then Ben, I was like really concerned, and you were too, but you said ‘I’d have more sympathy if he didn’t drive around with a huge SUV emblazoned with ‘The Dog-mobile’ on it. Seems if you’re trying to keep a low profile, you know.’
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Post by Looney Linn on Mar 9, 2004 22:00:42 GMT -5
C.O.: So Ben is also unsympathetic!
O.W.: Yeah!
C.O.: Incredible, these are great stories.
B.S.: Literally the first time I’ve ever been credited with saying that was just now.
O.W.: Awe, come on.
B.S.: I don’t buy the old, awe shucks I’m from Texas..
C.O.: You’re not buying it?
B.S.: No
C.O.: It’s working for me. Now you guys presented at the Oscars. I thought you did a really funny bit, thought you were hilarious on the show. Did you get feedback from…cause it’s seen by 800 million people.
B.S.: It was weird.
O.W.: You were a little down right when we got off. I felt I had to like buck you up, like ‘it went good.’ But I myself, wasn’t really sure if it had gone well and I called my parents. My dad gets on the phone then I hear my mom get on. My dad’s like ‘Oh, it went great, it was great!’ and there’s nothing from my mom. Mom how’d it go? ‘It was good, it was good. It was, you know, you don’t have to try and be funny, you can just be dignified.’ Like I’m up there making a fool of myself.
B.S.: Like it never really crossed our minds.
O.W.: Yeah, but it really was funny when you were like, getting ready, cause you know, the bit was you were supposed to come out as Starsky and looking kinda ridiculous. But Ben was looking in the mirror as we’re getting ready and he says like, ‘I know I’m supposed to look ridiculous, but I think I look good.’
C.O.: That’s what makes the bit good.
O.W.: Yeah
B.S.: I work in a very method sort of way
C.O.: Now, uh I was thinking about it today, you guys have worked together a lot haven’t you?
O.W.: Yes we have. We’re like, sorta like Hope and Crosby, kinda..
B.S.: But without the big following
O.W.: Yes, there it is!…it worked again!
B.S.: Yeah.
C.O.: Now this is the question you never get, Do you plan to work together again on some new projects?
B.S.: Well, actually, yes. Infact we haven’t really talked about this anywhere, I can say here, that we’ve actually signed an exclusive contract to only work together from now on in the future.
C.O.: Wow
B.S.: Yes, we have five movies coming out in the next two years.
C.O.: Five movies!
B.S.: Yeah, and we actually brought some of the posters from them so you can see what’s coming up.
C.O.: We’d love to see them.
B.S.: Yeah, cause you know, it’s so much fun working together.
O.W.: We’re just kind of spit-balling here, but we have some ideas.
B.S.: This one, the first one coming out this summer is a buddy comedy. Its, a, called Sumo Cum Laude. Two brothers, loosers, father says we have to graduate from college. We have to figure out how we’re gonna do it, become Sumo wrestlers. (picture of Owen and Ben’s heads superimposed over sumo wrestlers bodies)
C.O.: Yeah, sumo wrestlers, right.
O.W.: That one looks good.
C.O.: There’s a Conan part in there somewhere, I’ll be the uptight dean. I’m liking it.
B.S.: Seriously?
C.O.: Yeah
B.S.: Ok, and then we have sort of another buddy action thing with a twist. This one’s called Magnet Crotch and Iron Face. (Poster of Owen standing up with Ben’s head stuck to his crotch.)
It comes out in the fall
C.O.: That’s high concept.
O.W.: Ben’s ironface.
B.S.: It’s high concept but now a fall high concept. We’re trying to bring those into the fall.
C.O.: Now why do those two work together?
B.S: And then we thought for Christmas we’re going back to a classic. It’s the remake of Every WhichWay but Loose. (Poster of Owen and Ben with a monkey’s face on Owen’s back.)
C.O.: Wow, that’s great…That’s a classic right there. What’s with the orangatange?
B.S.: That’s disturbing
C.O.: That’s my favorite one.
B.S.: And then finishing up the slate, I think is a really kind of fun buddy movie.
O.W.: with an edge..
B.S.: Yeah, with an edge. It’s called Hitler and the Hipster. (Poster of Ben dressed as Hitler standing back to back with Owen.)
C.O.: Wow, those look like great movies.
B.S.: We like to start wit ha title and a concept and a poster and go backwards from there.
C.O.: Start with a poster and then you know you’ve got something.
B.S.: That’s right.
C.O.: And then test it.
B.S.: Test the poster, see if people like it, then make the movie.
C.O.: I love it. Now we have a clip here from Starsky and Hutch. I wanna make sure we get to this cause we’re having a lot of fun here, but we’re got to get the word out on Starsky and Hutch and you guys have not done enough interviews.
O.W.: Nope
B.S.: We haven’t.
C.O.: Tell us what we’re gonna see here.
B.S.: Ok
(Silence)
C.O.: Now this is a situation where Owen was supposed to come in and help you out and he didn’t do it. Isn’t that right.
B.S.: Right
O.W.: I missed my cue…try again.
B.S.: Ok
C.O.: Let’s pretend nothing happened just there and, uh this is incredible Starsky and Hutch. I understand you guys have a great set up to a clip. Let’s hear what’s going on.
O.W.: What, what we’re about to see is Ben and I are..
C.O.: That was too quickly, that was too fast. That made it look like you were clairvoiyant.
B.S.: Yeah
O.W.: My timing was a little off, I anticipated..
C.O.: Yeah
B.S.: It’s us, we bust into this assassins apartment and his son throws knives at us.
O.W.: We’re not sure if its his son or a tiny little man.
C.O.: Ok, let’s take a look at a clip from Starsky and Hutch.
(Shows the clip)
C.O.: He’s a good boy. Yes father, I shall throw many.
O.W.: Yes
C.O.: Starsky and Hutch in theaters now. Ben Stiller and Owen Wilson, continued success you guys. Thanks a lot.
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Kumar
Anthony's Spanish Tutor
Posts: 209
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Post by Kumar on Mar 10, 2004 3:06:04 GMT -5
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Post by Natalie on Mar 10, 2004 5:45:48 GMT -5
Thanks so much for typing all that out!!! It was awesome!
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Post by Pollyanna on Mar 10, 2004 6:09:01 GMT -5
Thanks for that Linn I really appreciate it For us Owen deprived non-Conan getting folks, you're a godsend!! Love the interview - Owen was hillarious as always ;D
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Post by Looney Linn on Mar 10, 2004 9:49:03 GMT -5
Hey Veronica, the way that he said kinda makes me think it wasn't a joke. I don't think his mom was neccessarily being unsupportive, she just kinda hoped he wouldn't have gone out there to be funny, i guess.
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Post by LegallyLukes on Mar 10, 2004 17:57:35 GMT -5
Thanks for the transcript ;D
Those two are really funny together. It's great when you have friends like that, that you can take the piss out of each other and have a good time.
I thought they were funny at the Oscars, myself. I love Owen in a tux!
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